Thoughts on female body standards and dating.
There’s a common dialogue among men… That the best (often meaning fastest) way to get a woman romantically comfortable with you, is to make your honest and benevolent opinions of her body more important to her than the media’s dishonest and evil opinions of it.
But the pitfall in this logic is that it often overshadows her own opinion of herself.
It says “Since your opinions of yourself are jaded by the evil media, they have been cruelly tarnished by fate and rendered inert, here let me save you from yourself like the hero that I am.”
Metaphorically speaking… You don’t heal a sick tree by setting the sick parts on fire. You support the tree in it’s own ability to heal itself.
It’s not enough to tell her that you think she’s beautiful and call the media wrong. You have to respect the battle she goes through every day to feel beautiful about herself. You have to stretch the bounds of sympathy as close to empathy as you possibly can.
And the biggest thing… Is this… If you’re not willing to join her in the fight against unfair body standards… No, honestly… If you’re not willing to fight that fight with or without her… Your words to her about her body are, and always will be, at least partially empty, and not completely trustworthy.
The worst possible thing you can do, is blame her for distrusting your words, when you’ve done nothing to prove that they are trustworthy, except offer them on a pretty platter.
You have to care about women as a whole, before you can say with honestly that one specific woman is beautiful.
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